Weddings

I have been to around twenty weddings in the last few years, celebrating with friends and family from across the country. The brides and grooms at these celebrations have all had different personalities so the styles they wanted to achieve for their big day was as varied as them.

There have been Tim Burton, barn, bonfire and hog roast, Pagan/Japanese fusion, a couple of Indian weddings with all the trimmings, and as per my heritage, a lot of Castles with Ceilidhs.

I haven’t always been the greatest fan of weddings. They had started to become routine, formulaic, dull and predictable. But maybe that’s because I had just been to a tad too many all rammed together in such a small time frame?

I had seen the stress and burden these special days place on the “happy couple”. By the time the big day arrives they were usually a little bit strained, a little bit glassy eyed, and a lot in debt! I didn’t understand the logic. But now, instead of discounting the whole institution of marriage, of holding these examples up as representative of the entire estate, I’ve realised they’re only a representation of the couple. You only get as stressed as you allow yourself to, to spend as much money as you can afford to.

I went to a wedding this weekend, and not to be soppy, it’s restored my faith in why people might want to spend all that time, money and effort on just one day. The wedding was simple, classic and funny. It was a homage to the couple and their nearest and dearest who have got them through their darkest days and celebrated with them in their happiest ones. 

The wedding was a riot, Prosecco from noon and throwing shapes on the dance floor like it was 2002 again! The groom’s speech was the cutest thing in the world and I left thinking maybe the whole institution isn’t all that bad?

Maybe my cold and cynical heart is thawing a bit? Maybe it wouldn’t be the worst thing to sign that bit of paper tying myself legally and spiritually to the same person for the rest of my days? Maybe I could still be involved in this institution one day but do it my way? No fuss? No frills? No financial ruin? Maybe finally at 31 I’m ready to settle down, grow up and stop running away from the scary realities of adulthood, commitment and mature relationships? Yikes!

But that’s for a whole other day. For the moment I’m happy to face up to the realisation that my cynicism about love and marriage whilst being the product of a broken home is the ultimate in clichés and it’s time to stop!